Whether you spend your Saturdays kicking, dunking, throwing, swimming, running, biking, swinging or just mowing, chances are you and every other active guy on the planet have one thing in common: muscle pain, and plenty of it.
If you were a professional athlete, you'd spend an hour packed in ice, take a spin in the whirlpool, work through a series of stretching exercises with the trainer and maybe pick up a prescription for one of the team doctor's "feel-good specials." But if you're just a regular guy, muscle pain is more likely to mean excavating your medicine cabinet in search of that near-empty tube of BenGay you remember seeing last spring. That's why the NBA star is back on the court in two days, while you still feel like a 165-pound bruise.
You may not have access to all those professionals and their pharmaceuticals, but you can fight muscle soreness with one of their most potent weapons: sports massage. The pros know there's more to massage than just relaxing the muscles. It can also improve range of motion, speed muscle recovery, prevent overuse injuries, even soften scar tissue from past injuries.
But who has the time (or the cash) for biweekly massages, other than all those pro athletes who get them for free anyway? Is your HMO going to pay for massage therapy because you got a knot in your calf while making whoopie? No problem, says Joan Johnson, author of The Healing Art of Sports Massage. "There's no reason why you can't treat yourself to a full-body sports massage anytime you want," she says. "All you need are your own two hands." It may not be as relaxing as the real thing, but then again, nobody else need see you buck naked, either. A self-sports massage is what you need to reduce tension, draw out the lactic acid that causes muscle soreness, and cut your recovery time dramatically.
This program works through every muscle group, identifying some common trouble spots for active men. To keep your hands from tiring, Johnson recommends working on your finger endurance twice a day by squeezing a foam ball, a lump of clay, a tennis ball--anything that won't get you arrested if you squeeze it in public. Start by using your entire hand to squeeze, then work each finger and your thumb individually, until your hands give out.
All of the following techniques should be done sitting on a mat on the floor. This position will help you relax more and let you reach certain parts of your body without placing strain on your back. Also, keep a moist, hot towel nearby to warm your hands from time to time. The heat helps loosen the muscles more easily. If you haven't paid your water bill, just rub your hands together quickly for a few seconds. Be sure to keep every stroke smooth, and spend a little extra time on any tight or tender areas you come across.

Triceps
This massage will help you recover after any activity where you throw, hit, serve or pass (such as, say, working as a bouncer in a sports bar). Bend your left arm at a 90-degree angle and rest your left hand on your stomach. Wrap your right arm around yourself and cup your right hand over the back of your left arm, just below the shoulder. Press your right hand into the triceps muscle and slowly move it down your arm towards the left elbow. Straighten your left arm as you go. (The area just above the elbow can be tender, so take it slow.) Your right hand should end up cupping your left elbow, with your left arm straight down at your side. Bend your left arm back into a 90-degree position and repeat three times, then switch to work your right arm.

Feet
Sit on the floor, legs straight in front of you, and rest one foot over the thigh of the opposite leg, so your legs form a figure 4. Hold your ankle with one hand and slowly rotate the foot clockwise with the other hand in small to large circles. Reverse the motion counterclockwise. Repeat three times in each direction. Next, grab your foot from the sides with both hands (as shown). Begin to stroke lengthwise up and down your sole, pressing your thumbs deep into it. After you've finished with the long strokes, use your thumbs to make a series of small circles up and down the sole. Don't forget to keep your fingers working along the arch. Finish by gently separating and pulling each toe sideways, then back and forth.

QUADRICEPS. This massage will be especially therapeutic after your first day on the slopes. To limber up the big muscles in the front of the thigh, squeeze the three middle fingers of your right hand together and press them into the top of your right thigh. Place your left hand over your right hand to help you apply more pressure. Slide your hands down your thigh until they end up just above the kneecap. Repeat the stroke, each time starting from a slightly different location on the thigh to completely loosen the muscle. Next, grab your thigh between both hands with your thumbs together and fingers wrapped around your leg. Begin moving your thumbs in a circular motion as you slide your hands toward your knee. Repeat several times.

Lower Leg
Sports that require you to push off vertically (basketball), horizontally (sprinting) or laterally (hockey) stress the lower legs. Start with the calves. Bend your right leg and grab the bottom of your calf muscle with both hands (as shown in fig. A). Apply pressure with your thumbs and slide your hands up the leg to the back of the knee. Repeat three times. Next, place your thumbs together at the top of your calf. Apply pressure and slowly pull your thumbs away from each other. Lower your hands about a half-inch and repeat, working down your calf until you reach your ankle. Repeat three times. For the shins, grip your ankle with fingers behind your calf and thumbs together in the front (fig. B). Stroke up the shin, then work back down in a series of small circles.

Lower Back
Sports that twist the body at the waist (golf, racquetball, girl-watching) can really wring out the lower back, but let's face it: Once you're north of 30, your lower back can always benefit from a little loosening. Start by lying on your back with your knees bent, feet flat on the floor. Stick a tennis ball directly under your lower back and place as much of your body weight as you can on the ball. Hold for a few seconds, then lift yourself and readjust the position of the ball. Continue to lower yourself onto the ball to apply pressure to all areas of the lower back.

Hamstrings
Any athlete whose sport involves running, even if it's just to fetch an errant lawn dart, is subject to tight hamstrings. To work them out, lie flat on your back with your right foot over your left knee. Grab your right leg just above the knee with both hands, with your fingers pressing into the back of your leg and your thumbs on top by your kneecap. Run your hands up your thigh, using your fingers to apply pressure as you go. Repeat several times. Finally, press the fingers of either hand into the middle of your hamstrings and slowly rub across the leg from side to side. (Apply enough pressure that your fingers don't slide across your skin.) Move your fingers every few seconds to work the entire muscle. For all of these motions, avoid putting direct pressure on the very back of the knee, where fragile tendons and ligaments lurk.

Hands
All this massage may stiffen your hands, so give them a rub, too. Begin by gently pulling each of your fingers with the thumb and fingers of your opposite hand. Gently stroke each finger as you go, applying firm but gentle pressure to any sore or tender areas. To work out the palm, loosely clasp your hands together by intertwining your fingers. Touch the thumb of your massaging hand to the area just below your opposite thumb and apply direct pressure for several seconds. Keep moving your massaging thumb around in a spiral, applying short bursts of pressure each time, until your thumb ends up in the center of your palm. Finish by stroking your thumb up and down into your palm.

Biceps
Pushed yourself a little too hard in the gym? To give yourself a shot in the arm, start by using your left hand to grab your right arm just above the elbow, so that your thumb points up toward your right shoulder. Your fingers should wrap around the outside of your arm and rest on the outside of your triceps (A). With your right arm down at your side, gently press your thumb into the biceps muscle and stroke upward toward your shoulder. Repeat several times. Next, reach your hand under your arm and place your thumb at the top of the biceps muscle below the shoulder. Your fingers should rest lightly underneath your arm (B). Press down gently with your thumb and push it from side to side across the tendon. Repeat several times, then switch to work the left arm. Pay extra attention to your dominant arm (the one you throw or hit with).

Forearms
Maybe you don't spend your Saturdays hanging from a sheer cliff face (or maybe you do), but no matter what your sport, your forearms can take a beating. Swinging a tennis racket, lugging a dumbbell, even riding a bike for a long stretch of time will build up tension in your forearms. Work it out by pressing your right thumb into the inside of your left forearm just above the wrist. Push it up along the forearm until it rests just below the bend in your elbow, then pull it back down, keeping tension on the forearm all the way. To work the other side (the hairy side), press your thumb into your forearm and begin opening and closing your fist. You'll feel the muscles writhe under your thumb.

Chest
Trying to impress that cute aerobics instructor with how much you can bench can make waking up the next morning a painful experience. To begin this massage, place your right hand behind your head so that your right elbow points upward. This will keep your arm out of the way while you work the right side of your body. Next, press the middle three fingers of your left hand together. Now you're ready to start. Begin by pressing the fingertips of your left hand into the area directly below your right nipple. Now gently move your hand upward toward your right shoulder, maintaining a light pressure. Once you reach your shoulder, lift your hand and place it below the nipple again, this time a half-inch away in either direction from where you originally started. Repeat the process, making sure to work through the entire area of the muscle.

Shoulders
Okay, Atlas, time to shrug off that burden. Start by bringing your left hand across your body and placing it on your right shoulder. Take your right hand and cup the bottom of your left elbow. This will keep your left hand stable when you start to massage. Bring the fingers of your left hand together and press them deep into your shoulder muscle. Slowly rock your fingers back and forth into the muscle for a few seconds, then place your fingertips a half-inch away and repeat. Continue this press-and-rock motion until you've thoroughly worked the entire shoulder muscle.

Upper Back
Sports that require you to push off with the arms, like cross-country skiing, can make your upper back so stiff, a straitjacket would feel more comfortable. This also applies to any throwing sports like baseball or football. To loosen up, assume the same starting position you used to work your chest--hand behind your head, elbow pointing upward. Your fingertips should be pressed together to help you apply deeper pressure into the muscles. Press your right hand against the left side of your back, directly below your left armpit, and stroke downward toward your waist. Once you reach the bottom, lift your hand and place it at a different location below your left armpit. You can also go across the back muscles, starting from the side and moving toward the center of the back, using short strokes as you go.

Neck
The neck is a spot where tension always seems to build up, even if your day consists of doing nothing but sitting at your desk and listening to your boss scream. To massage the right side of your neck, place your fingers of your right hand into the trapezius muscle, just below the base of your skull. Press into the muscle and slowly drag your fingers down and over toward your right shoulder while simultaneously tilting your head to the left. Your left ear should approach your left shoulder. Repeat this motion several times, then switch hands to work the left side of the neck.